The BIG Talks

Introducing and Providing Ongoing Opportunities for Talking With Pre-Teens and Teens About Sex, Reproduction, and Puberty

What Are The BIG Talks?

The BIG Talks are designed to be a series of meetings and learning opportunities for boys in 5th, then 7th, and then 9th grade. The first BIG Talk is a 2.5-hour meeting with boys and their parents that provides foundational, medically-accurate information on the basics of puberty and reproduction. Topics include: defining puberty and understand its purpose and process; the physical, social, and emotional changes that accompany puberty; the science behind reproductive anatomy and reproduction; the story of birth, and; the similarities and differences between boys’ and girls’ experiences during puberty. The second and third BIG Talks are more advanced and highlight additional, more mature topics for 7th and then 9th graders. These BIG Talks all occur with boys and their parents or caregivers attending together.

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The overarching goal of The BIG Talks program is twofold: to educate the boys and to lay the groundwork for ongoing discussions between boys and their parents as they develop and move through adolescence.

The BIG Talks take place at one of the participant’s homes and is done in a casual, matter-of-fact way that hopes to begin and then continue a dialogue between pre-teen and teen boys and their parents about growing bodies, puberty, sex, healthy relationships, and anything else in between. Slides and active discussion are used, with ample opportunity for the boys to ask questions. Boys and parents experience The BIG Talks in the same room at the same time, and each boy should attend with both parents, if possible.

“I was impressed by the BIG talk! Puberty and reproduction were represented in a very thoughtful way. My son later said to me that he knew a lot of the information but never knew the biology behind it, and now it makes a lot of sense. There were many things I heard in the BIG talk that I wouldn’t have even thought to talk about with my son. I’m happy we now have a comfortable dialogue started about the changes puberty will bring, and sex. I will definitely be doing this again with my younger boys. Truly, I was blown away by how great it was!”

Rachel | Mom of a 6th-grade boy

"As a mom of a teenage boy, an educator, and a former Dean of Students (6-12th graders), I can’t recommend Dr. Miller’s BIG Talk enough! Anyone who can get a group of boys who are on the cusp of or have started puberty to not only to listen to what he has to say, but to engage, ask questions, and fully participate is a magician! We thoroughly appreciated Dr. Miller’s knowledge, sensitivity, humor, openness, and willingness to address these important topics with our group. He provided the information to the boys and their parents in an easy-to-understand and compassionate way. We parents were all put at ease, and Dr. Miller really helped the boys feel that they were on this journey together. I know all the boys and parents were so appreciative of both the content and the way it was delivered. Dr. Miller’s BIG Talk is a MUST!”

Anna F. | San Diego, CA

“As a psychologist who specializes in sexual health, I know the importance of understanding and knowing our bodies as a psychologist who specialized in sexual health. As a mom of a teen boy, I appreciate that Dr. Miller is available to talk to our boys with their families present to model the importance of openly talking about the natural social, emotional, and physical changes that come with puberty. Dr. Miller naturally engages with his sense of humor, openness, and knowledge. He has an ease about him that makes the kids comfortable enough to ask questions and make comments. His work in this much-needed area is invaluable.”

Maribel B. Ph.D. | San Diego, CA

“I just wanted to follow up and let you know how pleased everyone was with Saturday’s BIG Talk. Some of the more skeptical dads walked away saying how impressed they were, and we all thought the kids seemed super engaged too. Thank you again for a great presentation and helping lay a foundation for all of us parents to work off of.”

Carlee G. | Mom of a 6th-grade boy

“Thank you, Dr. Miller. I really appreciated your talk and feel it was beyond important for our boys.”

Sherri | Mom of a 5th-grade boy

“Hi, Dr. Miller. A quick note to thank you again for the talk with the boys this morning. The way you managed the kids and kept them engaged the whole time was just very impressive! I had some follow-up discussions with my son that I couldn’t have had without this foundation of facts you articulated just in the right way for them.”

Raphael | Dad of a 5th-grade boy

“Our family really enjoyed your BIG Talk last weekend, and we have made several changes at home already as a result. My son really responded well to hearing the information from you…..thank you!”

Erin | Mom of a 5th-grade boy

“Thank you so much for The BIG Talk!! My son had some questions for me last night and clarifications from the talk that I was able to answer openly and in a straightforward way - it was SO awesome! It is also SUCH a relief to be able to discuss and share this info because of the foundation you built for us to navigate through this uncomfortable topic!! I will be reaching out in 2 years if not sooner (for my younger boy) to set up his BIG Talk!!”

Sunny | Mom a 6th-grade boy

“That was incredibly informative, spot on in fact! This information is power. It will really equip our sons. I appreciate that you delivered it in such a matter-of-fact (tangible) way. And all wrapped in a sense of kindness for oneself and others with the understanding that they are statistical miracles. Love this reminder! You’ve now given us a launching point to have further dialogue. Thank you!”

Kris | Parent of 5th-grade boy

The BIG Talks Curriculum:

(4th & 6th Grade)

(7th & 8th Grade)

Big Talks Remote-Online

The Remote BIG Talks

Can’t make it in person? The Remote BIG Talks offer the same trusted, interactive workshop online, giving you the flexibility to join from anywhere.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the cost?

The cost is $75 per boy/parent(s). Siblings attending together cost $125.

Where do BIG Talks take place?

Someone in the group hosts the event, and Dr. Miller travels to the location.

How long does a The BIG Talk typically last?

Anywhere from between 2.5 and 3 hours.

How much lead time does Dr. Miller need to schedule a BIG Talk?

That depends on Dr. Miller’s schedule, but typically about a month lead time is sufficient.

How do I pay?

Payment by check or Zelle (8584149332) is acceptable. You can make checks out to “BIG” or “Chris Miller”.

 

When do most BIG Talks take place?

BIG Talks are typically conducted on weekends, usually on Saturday or Sunday mid to late-afternoons. A specific day and time will be arranged by you and Dr. Miller.

Are there more than one BIG Talk?

Yes. The first BIG Talk is considered a “basics” talk for 5th-6th graders. The second BIG Talk is for 7th-8th graders and includes more in-depth information about more advanced topics. The third BIG Talk is for 9th-10th graders and addresses more advanced topics like healthy relationships, dating, and consent.

Is there a way to review the content for the first, second, and third BIG Talks?

Yes.  Just scroll up and click on the icon for whichever talk you are interested.

Can my son attend alone?

We do not encourage it.  In fact, having both parents attend (if possible) is best.  Having one attend is just fine too.

Do you offer remote/Zoom BIG Talks?

Yes.  The content (lecture and slideshow) is identical to an in-person talk.  The cost is $75 for the remote BIG Talk.

Are there additional materials I can access (like handouts) that provide resources for parents and boys?

Yes.  At each BIG Talk, Dr. Miller will bring resource and other handouts, but these materials can also be accessed on the website.  Just click here to take a look.

Are there talks for girls?

BIG does not provide BIG Talks for girls. However, there are two organizations that do. You may contact Linda Sheldone, R.N., at Sisterhood Seminars at (760) 685-2961 or linda@sisterhoodseminars.com. You may also contact Healthy Chats for Girls at https://healthychats.com.

About the Facilitator

Dr. Christopher Miller is the Founder and Director of BIG and the developer of The BIG Talk, with over 20 years of experience as a clinical psychologist. He has educated hundreds of boys and parents about puberty and reproduction in both school and private settings. My role is to facilitate the process of you and your sons communicating about this vital aspect of life. I will be providing key facts for your sons to learn, but you will infuse these facts with your own personal values and perspectives. Learning these facts is the first step, but your sons also need to know how to make sex a safe, healthy, and sacred part of their lives. I am confident that you will use the BIG Talk experience as a springboard for further talks.

About-Graphic-Chris, image of Chris Miller.

Are you ready to take the next BIG step?

BIG offers a variety of services for boys and young men ages 5 and above, their caregivers, and those who work with boys in different settings. Click the button to get started.